Let's talk about (real) sex: Dr Cath Mercer at TEDxLSE 2014
Let’s Talk About (Real) Sex: Here Are 13 Things That Are Only True In Porn
Photo Courtesy of Women’s Health
Much like your love life doesn’t resemble a Nicholas Sparks movie, your sex life is probably a far cry from what you see in porn. And while it’s fine to use it to help spice things up—both solo and with your partner—it’s crucial to remember that these X-rated clips aren’t the real deal. Check out some of the most unlikely, unrealistic, and sometimes laughable sexpectations we get from porn below!
1. Everyone has an orgasm…every time.
So you don’t always climax, and that’s totally fine. You can still have awesome sex without an orgasm. But if you’re looking to up your chances, try these positions that practically guarantee an orgasm.
2. You always clock at least 30 scripted minutes in bed.
Hey, quickies happen, and they can be great. Other times, you may keep the action going for hours. As long as your needs are being met, who needs a time frame?
3.You’re perfectly groomed below the belt before every single hookup.
Unless you’ve got a waxing specialist on standby, you’re probably not super-smooth all month long. Plus, we’re willing to bet you don’t let a few stray hairs stand in the way of a good time.
4.And your guy’s skin is as smooth and soft as Channing Tatum’s.
Manscaping may be required in porn, but it’s not always the norm in real life.
5. Missionary is out. Whips and chains are in.
We’re all for experimenting in bed, but that doesn’t mean you need to try something new every single night. Porn tends to hint that ‘vanilla sex’ is bad and that you need to be wild and crazy all the time, says sex therapist Brandy Engler, Ph.D., author ofThe Men on My Couch. The bottom line: Do what feels good.
6. Who needs condoms when his biceps are that huge!?
The guy might look like Ryan Gosling and have a list of reasons why protection isn’t necessary, but you should never have sex with a stranger without a condom. Plus, they’re not all that bad, we promise.
7.Your reactions are always Oscar-worthy in bed.
When something feels good, definitely let your partner know. But that doesn’t mean moaning so loud your neighbors hear it. Women tend to see things in porn they think they need to mimic, “like false or over-exaggerated enthusiasm instead of just your natural response,” says Engler. Don’t go overboard—your partner will see right through it.
8. Every guy you sleep with will be very well endowed.
So this is why guys are so concerned about their penis sizes. And even though a recent study found that some women have an easier time climaxing with a bigger guy, it’s definitely not a requirement for great sex. In fact, experts say that your connection with your partner is a much bigger factor.
9. You never have sex on your period…period.
In porn world, period sex just isn’t on the agenda. But a recent MensHealth.com survey found that more than three-quarters of guys say they’re down for it. If you’re in, here are the tips and positions to make it even better.
10. Having a mid-day hookup at the office is totally acceptable.
What soundproof office building do these people work in? (See also: having sex in a restaurant, park, or gym.) Use these tips for out-of-the-bedroom sex ideas that won’t get you arrested.
11. Uncircumcised guys are a thing of the past.
You may not see it on screen, but there are still a ton of guys sporting penis sleeves. Here’s what you need to know about sex with an uncircumcised guy.
12. Every guy wants to have a threesome/role play/dominate you/etc.
Just like you’re not into everything you see online, your guy isn’t either, says Engler. So don’t assume he wants to act out every fantasy listed in his browser history.
13.What a coincidence—you both want to have sex allthe time.
There are a number of reasons you’re just not in the mood. And a ton of men have issues with erectile dysfunction—even guys under 40. So don’t worry if one or both of you isn’t raring to go 24/7. That’s normal!
Video: Let's Talk About Sex, Coach!
How to Report Someone for Benefit Fraud
How to Write Baby Shower Thank You Notes
Pear and Apple Crisp
How to Write Open Ended Questions
How to start something that scares you (and I’m Twittering)
Itchy Butt Heres How to Know if Its Hemorrhoids
Marathoner of the Week: Woody Martin
How to Multiply Fractions With Whole Numbers
Ease Ulcer Symptoms With a Food Diary
How to Build Self Worth
Men Have Biological Clocks, Too — And Its Time They Started Listening to Them